The Lost

It all began after he was born. He hated himself and other people hated him also. How many years of torture can he be expected to go through? He wonders, do people get a second chance at life? Have a chance to live another life, Just to fix the mistakes in the previous one. Will I ever get that chance he asks himself? Soon enough he will get the chance. Just fix all the mistakes that his parents put him down for all the time. When will the chance to change come?

Just keep hoping and praying, when the chance comes he will know. Walking down the road he could care less about what could happen to him. The sound of the traffic surrounds him from the front of him and behind him. The large buses and tractor trailers pass by him at least going 50 mile per hour leaving large gusts of cold wind.  As he just looks down both sides of the street the trees stand out on both sides. He can smell the fresh fall air. It does seem to feel relaxing, but only by a little. It felt so strange. Something seemed familiar. Josh was walking down the street. Josh is tired and so cold. Before he started walking he picked up the jacket that was next to him. He did not even know if it was his jacket. He could not remember. The jacket was made out of light cloth. It had buttons and was black. It could not protect Josh against the harsh bitter winds of New York’s winter climate. Josh thought to search the jacket before he took it. It had a dirty napkin in one pocket and some crushed leaves in both pockets.

It was a cold morning as Josh walked down to the SEPTA bus station. The cold gusts of wind blew across his face. He could only stand next to the curb and watch the gleaming orange light from the burning cigarette that someone had thrown onto the side walk a few minutes before. Josh could feel the warmth from the cloud of cigarette smoke. Where would Josh go today, if only he could remember? It seemed like a long wait in the cold perhaps a ten minute wait for the bus. There was only one really attractive woman on the bus. She had red smooth lips, curly brown hair, blue eyes and a medium build. Josh would remain quiet as he sat two rows behind her. His head was killing him. Every turn the bus made Josh could hear the wheels screech. Nothing seemed familiar as the bus continued on.  The only thing that Josh could think of was a train. Josh got off the bus at the Langhorne Train station. Josh looked at the schedule for five minutes. Should I head towards the center city or towards west Trenton? He had a gut feeling that he should take the train at six fifty five. Josh sat down on the inside bench as he waited fifteen minutes for the train. Josh sat in the first train car which was quiet and only had a few other passengers such as the fat woman wearing a green coat with a purple hat. The next stop was Neshaminy Falls, then Trevose, then Somerton, Then Forest Hills, then Philmont, then Bethares, then Meadowbrook and finally Rydal. Rydal train station looked strange, so Josh got off at that stop. Maybe he could find something there.  The lights at the Rydal train station were dull and kept flickering. All Josh had in his pocket were a couple of napkins, a green pen, some leafs, and a faded ID badge that read “Josh Leadom”.

From the Rydal train station Josh slowly walked down a couple of streets to see if anything looked familiar. Looking at a reflection of him through a store window, Josh can see his green eyes and his face which is not clean shaven. He looks so thin now. At the moment he could picture himself in front of a warm fireplace where he would be drinking a fresh pot of coffee, and then he stopped where he could smell a fresh brewing pot of coffee. Josh walked through the door with a red open sign. The pot was beginning to fill with the fresh Colombian coffee. Josh picked up a gray cup and dumped five sugar packets and poured some two percent milk into his coffee. Josh drank the coffee like there was no tomorrow. There was not a drop left in the cup.

Josh wondered for what seemed like forever, what he would do next, where would he go? He wished he could remember everything. Did he have a family? Was there anyone looking for him? Why can’t he remember? Josh puts his hand on his head; his head hurts so badly it feels like it is ready to combust. As Josh gets up and walks toward the door he begins to see blackness which swallows him up. Hours later there is a cold white sheet with a soft fluffy pillow it feels so cold like it is the middle of the winter, but it is hard to complain since Josh can’t remember the last time he was laying in a bed like this.

Josh leans up as a nurse in blue walks into the room. The nurse looks about twenty five with light brown hair and blue eyes. She had her fingernails painted white and a name badge over the left side of her chest that read Elizabeth. How long will it take for Josh to be identified? As far as he can remember he has been to a bank and to Chick-Fil-A and the one girl who was working at the Chick Fill A recognized him from being at the bank while she was at the bank. Josh only waited in line for a cup of water. All Josh could wish for was for someone to tell him where he lives and where he came from. The memory loss is crucial, when Josh goes somewhere to get something he can’t remember exactly what that something is or where he wanted to go.

—Jason Leedom